One year ago today I was in bed, recovering from surgery where I had the tumor removed from my neck for biopsy. One year ago today I got the phone call from Dr. Barnes, telling me that I did, indeed, have cancer. One year ago today I walked into the home office, sat down on the couch next to John and cried.

I cried, then dried my tears and said "..... This blows." Then I paused and said "I'm going to kick cancer's ass." I was never so determined to do something in my entire life.

One year ago today I called my parents and my boss to give them the news.

One year ago today I had long blond hair, and the prospect of all that hair falling out was the worst thing I could think of. The prospect of having a semi permanent catheter installed in my chest made me want to cry. The prospect of being sick made me furious, and the prospect of letting cancer get in my way was unacceptable.

And today I am cancer free. Today I am working hard. Today I will go to the gym at lunch and work out, which is a gift that at times, seemed impossible. Today I will run. Today I have short brown hair, and today I know that losing your hair is not the worst thing that can happen. Today I know what a pleasure it is to wake up early and be able to do things for myself. Today I know that being healthy is the most wonderful thing I can think of. Today I am thankful for John and his patience. Today I know that there really is nothing that would pull us apart. Today my lungs are clear and I can breathe. Today I am not in pain.

Today is the greatest day ever.

Aw, MAN. So the Broncos lost. Pittsburgh was really good, I have to hand it to them. It was SO cool to be that close to the field.

John bought two Tomb Raider games for me and I am officially a video game junkie. I cannot make myself stop. Someone help me. STOP THE MADNESS! I get so frustrated when I can't get to the next level. It's like video crack. So I spent much of my weekend bleary eyed, knowing I should go get some sleep, but unable to tear myself away from the joystick.

I went back to the gym last week, and I've been working out during lunch. It feels good to be back. I'm surprised how difficult cardio is for me. It leaves me alot more winded than it used to. But I'll get there. Three cheers for the gym! I feel great.

GO BRONCOS!!!!

We went to the game on Saturday, and had a blast. There was a little incident where one of the guys that was in our group got too drunk to walk and fell over two rows of people, making me awfully glad my husband is not a drunk moron. :) We'll be going to the game on Sunday as well... think I'll knit myself a new scarf to match my Bronco hat. It would be SO COOL if the Broncos went to the superbowl!

My Christmas present from John...I am now registered for more culinary school! So SO excited. I am taking the French cooking classic techniques class in February. It's been too long since I've been to cooking school, and it is definitely one of my most favorite things.

Here's the course description:

Classic Techniques: French Menus

Explore French cooking through its regional cuisines by studying the unique climates and cultures of Provence and Burgundy. Wine will be served and discussed to advance your culinary knowledge and ability to pair wine and food.



Provence

Objectives: Introduction to Bread Doughs, Leavening with Starters, Shaping Boules, Tart Doughs
Menu: Semolina Bread, Moules au Pistou, Pan Seared Lamb, Lion in Pistacio Crust and Herb Au Jus, Potato Galette, Eggplant, Onion and Tomato Tian, Apricot Bread Pudding, Grand Marnier Sauce




Burgundy
Objectives: Pate a Choux, Egg Poaching, Fish Butchery, Coulis, Crème Fraîche, Custards
Menu: Wild Mushroom Jalousie, Grilled Salmon Fillet, Buerre Rouge Sauce, Grilled Baby Vegetables, Ginger Bread, Currant and Cassis Sauce

Ew.

Yet another lesson learned about the pond in my backyard. If you let the water get yucky, you WILL lose fish. I pulled five dead fish out of the pond today, two full grown and three babies. Gross.

This promptly followed by a five minute panic session, and then an hour of cleaning muck out of the thirty five degree water, changing of the pond filter, and cursing myself for letting it get like that.

Bleh. Hopefully my efforts today will help so that we don't lose any more.

I was really starting to dislike my hair, even though I'm overjoyed that I actually *have* hair. I went to Antoine Du Chez this afternoon and got a haircut, and I LOVE it. So here's the new 'do!

UGH

Working through and after the holidays is such a pain in the arse.

We are so unbelievably busy, and the new company that bought us has put a strict "no overtime" policy on us... and this is not a job you can complete in 40 hours. It's just not. But I will make it work. Everytime some obstacle comes up, you just have to find a way to make it work.

I heard Melissa Etheridge's new song "I Run For Life" on Leno and I LOVE LOVE LOVE her. She is one of the coolest people I can think of, right up there with Lance Armstrong. They are my insta-comrades.

I met a lady on New Year's Eve that was invited to our house by one of her friends. Her name is Phyllis. She had cancer-- melanoma. And she smokes like a chimney. Okay, I'm sorry, but I have no sympathy for people like that. If you've had cancer you are more susceptible to getting a secondary cancer later in your life, and I like to do everything I can to lower that chance. I hate sitting next to people in restaurants smoking. I hate the way it smells, I hate they way they think it's okay to push their second hand smoke off on the rest of us. They whine when certain communities make smoke-free laws. Whine all you want, schmucks. The rest of us are trying NOT to get lung cancer. I understand that it's addictive. If you want to pollute your own lungs, go right ahead. But I think it's ridiculous that I have to smell your cigarette while I'm eating dinner. Bleh. I could go on and on.

Um. What else... what else.... I think that's it.

So, let's review:

1. I hate being this busy at work.
2. I love Melissa Etheridge.
3. I hate cigarette smoke. And people that have had cancer and smoke baffle me.


Okay. Ship shape. You are now updated on my Tuesday.