random daily thoughts. with some "i just beat cancer" stuff thrown in.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005




I snapped this photo of my hair with my camera phone this evening, for your viewing enjoyment. It is getting SO long and it is so good to have hair. Now, here's one from September so you can see just how darn fast my hair is growing:



Good news! My PET scan came back completely clean! For all you non-cancer patients out there, that means there is still no sign of cancer in my body, and that is FRIGGIN AWESOME news. :)

possible titles for today's entry:

1. Allyson hates to work.
2. Stop calling me, you moron, I am not answering my phone. I am busy returning the forty seven other messages.
3. Allyson forgets to do many things and falls behind.
4. The little red light on my phone keeps blinking.
5. I wonder what would happen if I just left for lunch and didn't come back?
6. I hate my hairdo today and I feel like a lard ass.


Ugh. Work, schmerk. I have had it. I think instead of working I would like to eat thick cut bacon and hash browns and eggs, over medium. Mmm. And coffee. And then I would like to put on pajamas and crawl under the cozy cozy covers. Yesh.

Please, would anyone like to work for me today? I am begging you.

Thursday, December 15, 2005





My dog can poop! YAY! I got to pick him up yesterday from the vet and he feels *so* much better.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

There are times in my life when I'd like to grab certain people by the neck and choke them. Just a little bit. I mentioned previously that we had adopted Winston, who came (back) to us via John's ex.

He's been having some poo problems, very constipated, and I thought I should take him to get checked out. So I get him into the vet, and he suggests we do an xray. The xray shows that poor Winston's colon is COMPLETELY blocked up. No wonder he didn't feel like eating! The vet said it is a good thing I brought him in when I did, because often the colon will rupture, and then you have either a VERY sick or very dead dog on your hands. So they are keeping him today, possibly overnight to get him cleaned out, run some blood tests, and figure out what we can do to get Winston's poo moving freely.

Having suffered constipation from chemo, I have to tell you it is NO FUN. And I feel really bad for little Winston. I can't imagine how crummy he must feel. But we will make him better.

I digress. I think that this is a problem that has been ongoing, and had that STUPID GIRL (enter expletive of your choice) taken proper care of him, it wouldn't have progressed to such an awful state. Had he been with an owner consistently that knew how to feed him, etc. I don't think it would ever have become such an issue.

Ugh. Makes me want to snatch her baldheaded. :)

But I guess that's the reason Winston came to live with me, so that I could make sure he's happy and healthy.

Friday, December 09, 2005

Stolen from oakland heidi


A is for age: 25
B is for booze of choice: pinot grigio
C is for career: insurance adjuster
D is for your dad's name: Paul
E is for essential items to bring to a party: John, wine, hors d 'oeuvres.
F is for favorite song at the moment: Push It- Garbage
G is for favorite game: Parcheesi
H is for hometown: Aurora, CO
I is for instruments you play: piano
J is for jam or jelly you like: raspberry jalapeno jam
K is for kids: No thank you.
L is for living arrangements: Me and John, 3 bulldogs, 1 kitty cat, a whole grip of fish in our house.
M is for mom's name: Becky
N is for name of your crush: Oh Matthew McConaughey!
O is for overnight hospital stays: never overnight, but I have spent my fair share of time in hospitals.
P is for phobias: I don't really have any. I guess I don't like bugs.
Q is for quotes you like: "All growth is a leap in the dark, a spontaneous unpremeditated act without the benefit of experience." - Henry Miller
R is for relationship that lasted the longest: current- since 2001
S is for sexual preference: John.
T is for time you wake up: Usually 7:00 am
U is for underwear: They have to be cute. I love victorias secret.
V is for vegetable you love: broccoli. and green beans!
W is for weekend plans: Sleep, catching up at work, and more sleep.
X is for x-rays you've had: just chest. Unless you count scans as xrays. In which case I had everything xrayed.
Y is for yummy food you make: beef burgundy, cheddar corn chowder.
Z is for zodiac sign: pisces

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Look at this picture I found! :) It is John and I on one of our first vacations together. We were stuck at the airport in Miami due to weather. We have had about four margaritas a piece in this photo.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

It is SO GOOD to feel so good. I feel so good lately. I mean, I do still have side effects, and probably will for some time. My neck hurts almost all the time-- that's due to scar tissue and the nerves in my neck compressing from the scar tissue. I still don't feel like I'm at 100%, but I feel damn good. I don't feel so short of breath and I don't feel so TIRED anymore. That's really nice.

What is freaky is that I still get sharp pains in my neck from time to time and I get a bit panicky and I reach up and feel the spot on my neck where my tumor used to be. Just to make sure it's not coming back. And there's never anything there, but it is still pretty scary. It's scary to hear stories of my fellow survivors relapsing and having to go through treatment all over again. That is very very frightening. I have moments of extreme fear and sadness. But those pass quickly as I remind myself not to let that feeling take over.

Yes, there is always the possibility that I will get cancer again. But all that means is that I have to go back into ass-kicking mode for the time being. There are times when I have to take a step back and get some perspective over my situation and remember what my job is on this planet. My job does not entail sitting here and being afraid. My job is, quite simply, to live. And live well.

Monday, December 05, 2005




Somebody's got a case of the Mondays. That somebody is me. I don't deny it. All I want to do is lay in bed and watch reruns of "Paula's Home Cooking" on food tv.